Asking your preschool for a teacher recommendation or school report

Ask the teacher or director who knows your child best, explain what the application asks for, and give them the form and submission instructions. Make the request with enough lead time for the educator to plan, then follow the application’s directions about who submits the report. A recommendation is the educator’s view of your child in a learning setting, not a script to control.

• Ask whether the person has time and feels able to write a useful, candid report.
• Share the form, instructions, submission method, and the schools receiving it.
• Offer brief context about your child’s interests, routines, or recent growth, without suggesting what the teacher should say.
• Thank them after they agree and again after the form is submitted.

What should you ask the preschool?

Start with the application instructions. Some applications request a teacher recommendation, some request a director or administrator report, and some use a shared form. The Los Angeles Area Independent Schools consortium publishes a preschool-to-kindergarten recommendation form, while the National Association of Independent Schools describes teacher recommendations as one possible application component. Requirements differ, so confirm the exact form and process with each admissions office. Sources: LAIS recommendation forms; NAIS application guidance.

Then ask the teacher or director privately and directly: “Would you feel comfortable completing this recommendation? I can send the form and instructions.” This gives them room to decline or explain that another educator may know your child better. Choose someone with firsthand experience of your child’s play, learning, communication, or routines.

If the application asks for a director’s report and a teacher recommendation, treat them as separate requests. Ask the admissions office if it is unclear which person should complete each form. Do not assume that one report can replace another.

When should you ask?

Ask as soon as you know a recommendation is needed and have the form or request instructions. Educators manage classroom responsibilities alongside application requests; early notice gives them a chance to plan. NAIS places recommendation requests in its application planning guidance, but its general timeline does not set a due date for every school. Source: NAIS application guidance.

Point the recommender to the submission instructions in each application. If you are applying to several schools, share the full list and explain whether each uses the same form or a separate request. Keep a simple record of who has agreed and how each school expects to receive the report.

What information should you give the teacher?

Make the task easy to understand. Send the blank form or electronic request, the applicant name the form asks for, the receiving schools, and the submission directions. If the teacher needs a family authorization or release, complete that part and return it as instructed.

Offer short, factual context that can help the educator recall your child: a recent interest, a transition, a language your child uses, or a support routine that works. The National Association for the Education of Young Children describes family and educator communication as an exchange of knowledge about a particular child. Use that exchange to provide context, not to coach the educator’s evaluation. Sources: NAEYC: Engaging in Reciprocal Partnerships with Families; NAEYC: Building Partnerships with Your Child’s Teacher.

You might write: “Lately, building with blocks has been a favorite activity. When a project gets difficult, they often watch another child first, then ask for help. Please include whatever observations you think are relevant.” Keep the example honest and concise. Do not ask the teacher to emphasize selected strengths, avoid a concern, or predict how your child will do elsewhere.

Is the recommendation confidential?

Follow the form’s instructions and the admissions office’s process. Some recommendation forms are marked confidential and ask the educator to submit them directly. A Los Angeles area preschool recommendation form, for example, describes a confidential process and asks applicants to give the recommender the schools’ submission instructions. That example does not establish the process for every application. Source: LAIS preschool-kindergarten recommendation form.

Do not ask to read a confidential report or request a preview unless the form or admissions office says that is permitted. If you have questions about access, consent, or what information is shared, ask the preschool and receiving admissions office before submitting the request. California’s preschool program guidance includes privacy and confidentiality among its recommendations for program operations; it does not determine the rules of a particular admissions application. Source: California Department of Education: Preschool Program Guidelines.

What if the teacher cannot write it?

Thank them for telling you, then ask the admissions office whom it will accept instead. A teacher may lack enough firsthand experience, time, or permission under preschool policy to complete outside forms. Do not pressure them to agree. Ask the school whether a director, another caregiver, or a different document is acceptable before choosing a substitute.

How should you thank them?

Thank the educator when they agree, and send a brief follow-up after the report is submitted. Name the effort you appreciate without asking what they wrote. A simple note is enough: “Thank you for taking the time to complete the recommendation. We appreciate your support and care for the student.”

For other application pieces, see the private school application checklist and parent statement guide. For preparation before a child visit, read what to expect at a private kindergarten assessment or visit.

What do parents ask about this request?

Parent question, anecdotal: The question behind this guide is how to request a recommendation without making the preschool relationship awkward. No parent survey or individual parent accounts were supplied for this draft, so this question is a prompt for the guide, not evidence about what families generally experience.

What do early childhood and admissions sources say?

Professional guidance: NAIS explains that schools set their own application requirements and weigh application components in their own ways. NAEYC emphasizes reciprocal communication between families and educators, while California preschool guidance addresses privacy in program communications. These sources support a respectful, clear request; they do not create a universal recommendation policy. Sources: NAIS application guidance; NAEYC family partnership guidance; California Department of Education preschool guidance.

Next step: Check one application’s recommendation instructions, then ask the educator who knows your child best whether they are comfortable completing it.

Reviewed October 2026. Parent evidence is labeled anecdotal; professional and admissions guidance is labeled by source and scope.